Truth Tellers, Love Lushes & Hope Healers

Truth

Love

Hope

Foundational words for a brighter tomorrow.  

Foundational words for a happier mindset.  

Foundational words for a healthier body.

Foundational words for healing your heart.  

But can you have one without the others?  

Let’s define these words and see how they correlate.  

Truth:  the quality or state of being true, that which is true or in accordance with fact or reality, a fact or belief that is accepted as true.  

Love:  an intense feeling of deep affection, a great interest and pleasure in something, like or enjoy very much.  

Hope:  a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen, grounds for believing something good will happen, intend if possible to do something 

Truth, Love and Hope go hand in hand but you have to have them in equal parts to have the desired effect.  

Using the title, let’s say you are strictly a Truth Teller.  You approach all situations with facts.  You have evidence backed up by reality and past experiences.  You keep your heart out of the matter and your main goal is to instill knowledge, strip down the situation to the bare bones of data to prove your point, illustrate your feelings, relate in a relationship.  

Or maybe you are a Love Lush, everything you say or do is out of a place of deep affection for someone or something.  You love the person or thing so you are willing to accept any and all parts.  There is no judgement, no negative, no overtones of reality; it’s truly being blinded by love.  

Perhaps you are a Hope Healer.  You hope for the best, always looking for the silver lining, refusing to acknowledge that consequences are real.  You are ever hopeful that no matter the situation you can wish it away and heal the problem with thoughts of what would be good.  

As I’m writing this I can see which category I fall into… I’m definitely a Hope Healer with a touch of Love Lush.  Truth can be difficult.  Not because I lie but because a hard truth, something that might need to change, that might be hurtful to hear, that’s damaging to myself or someone else, is difficult for me to articulate.  I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.  I don’t want to discourage anyone.  I don’t want to be the reason some is feeling dragged down or depressed about a certain situation.  And I certainly don’t want to inflict any of those feelings on myself.    

But the truth of the matter is if I’m not willing to say the hard truth to myself or to another person I’m not doing anyone any favors. 

Similarly, if I’m not willing to love someone beyond their rough edges or be hopeful for someone who seems lost, what good am I in the relationship?   

Being all of only one of these categories is not a friend to anyone’s destiny.  We don’t develop relationships to be placated, falsely secure, blindly agreed with.  We develop relationships, whether it’s friendships or marriages, co-working relations, teams, partners, etc… to be held accountable, to become better at what we do, to be celebrated and supported.  

It’s a combination of all of these categories that bring the magic to any relationship.  

Standing in line at the grocery store if you kindly tell the person that cut in line that the back of the line is just beyond that magazine rack and you didn't realize it either but you’re trying to save them some dirty looks and potential harassment, a person is likely to appreciate it.  It was honest, it came out of a place of love and you’re hopeful that they will heed your words and move to their spot in line.  Contrarily, if you say hey dummy, the line is back there… It’s not that it isn’t true but it also doesn’t account for any love or hope.  It’s not that this person is so close to you that you feel the need to preserve them but why be harsh for no reason.  After all, we are called to love our neighbors whether we know them well or not, be our brother's keeper, love people the way Jesus did.  Why let them cut in line when it’s not their turn?  Why hope they realize and correct the situation saying nothing?  

There is a way to bring these three aspects together that works, that keeps the connection and lets the person speaking and the person listening feel valued and cared for.  

You can’t have truth without love.  You can’t have love without truth.  You can’t have hope without truth nor hope without love.  They all work together.  

If you love someone you will tell them the truth, even the hard truth because you care about them enough that they need to be let in on the reality of the situation.  You cover it with hope; hope that they hear you, hope that they can change, hope that you will be by their side, hope that enduring the issue together will ultimately bring you closer together.  

If you are honest with someone it is because you love them.  It’s because you are hopeful that the honesty you’re sharing will in some way benefit them and potentially you too.  

If you are hopeful for a person you must first love them enough to tell them the truth and provide them with encouragement to overcome an obstacle.     

It’s easier said than done, particularly when our feelings get wrapped up in the situation.  As people we want to make someone feel how we've felt or understand on a close level the hurt, damage, pain that was caused.  

But in all sincerity this doesn’t work.  It’s not coming out of truth, love or hope.  It’s revenge.  It’s getting even.  It’s leveling the playing field.  Instead of healing the hurt it’s digging a deeper hole.  

It’s a challenge, but one we should all be facing head on.  Mingling our truth, love and hope ultimately is what is going to heal each other and ourselves.

Think of your speech when you are dealing with others.  Our words speak life or leave terrible wounds.  You must relate your truth with love and hope.  You can’t cut someone down with words and expect them to bounce right back and make the changes you have suggested.  You also can’t love someone enough to make them spearhead a change if you’ve never broached the problem with them.  

Oh, friends, it’s a hard but worthy endeavor to take charge of your words and feelings.  It’s difficult to stand up for yourself, it’s scary to put your heart on the line, it’s crushing when your hopes are not met.    Truthfully I tell you I love you and have hope for all of you.  I honestly want you to stand proudly for who you are and what you believe, let the world know in a loving and genuine way and be hopeful that you will find your tribe and your tribe will find you.